Not sure if this post is “Funny Ha Ha” or if its “Whatevaz Whateva” so for the first time OH&H is giving a post a double category. I honestly am not sure what to do with this story so pardon the confusion while I type.
On July 4 a mega-church, or I guess its a giga-church (toMAYtoe, toMAtoe) put up a 72 foot statue of Lady Liberty. It cost tithe payers…I mean rich Christians…um, what I’m trying to say is all the friendly giving folks at World Overcomers Outreach Ministries Church dropped a cool $260,000. It makes sense though if you think about it. This 12,000 member church in Memphis already has a bowling alley, bookstore, roller rink, school, and cafe. The next logical step in my eyes is “King Nebuchadnezzar made an image of gold, ninety feet high and nine feet…” wait, wrong story…the next step is Pastor Alton Williams leading his congregation to put this Jolly Green giant of a thing in front of their church. “This statue proves that Jesus Christ is Lord over America, he is Lord over Tennessee, he is Lord over Memphis,” says Willliams. I think it was at this moment the Angels in heaven cheered. With wings painted Red, White, and Blue the Angels above blared “God Bless the USA” By Lee Greenwood. I don’t know about you but heaven just got more appealing. (vomit sounds)
Some people in the community were outraged by this statue. But I say shame on you community. You should have seen it coming. It was not long ago this same church paid for full page ads in major Memphis newspapers condemning homosexuality. Nothing says love like “We hate gay people. ”
When asked why would you spend so much money on a statue when there are people in need, Pastor Williams replied , “We give millions to the poor.” Oh Pastor W, that’s what we sinners call justification. Besides, I think you had your Blackberry off when the poor around the world sent you an email. They’re tired of getting more money. They want you to know they give Lady “Love” 2 thumbs up and raise their dirty disease filled water glasses up high and toast to all the wonderful things she will bring to the community. Is it just me or is everyone just feeling so thankful God loves America more than any other country?
I’m sad to say this could be my last blog post ever. OH&H very well could be no more. Why you ask? Well, I also heard that in one of Pastor W’s books he states how Katrina was the result of sin and debauchery. If thats the case there is a very good chance an asteroid will be hitting my house tonight and I will die. If you never hear from me again please play “Friends Are Friends Forever” by Michael W. Smith at my funeral and please don’t forget to drape the American flag over my casket. Wait, I think I want to be cremated. Damnit, am I going to hell for that?
SB
