Organic Half & Half

Have you noticed how sometimes your greatest strength is also your greatest weakness? For me it couldn’t be more true. When God created me He chose to give me something that is probably the one thing that sets me apart in both a good and bad way. Passion. You could describe me as an “Extreme Extremist”. Over the past several years I’ve realized that this has been my downfall because I began to enjoy the bad passion more than the good. It’s kind of like a garden hose that has been turned on full blast. The only problem is I am not holding the hose. So its dancing like a snake swerving left and right getting everything wet but the garden. Sure the water is a GOOD thing. But not when it soaks the house, the grill, windows, and even myself. I’ve realized that I must grab a hold of the hose and point it TOWARDS the flowers. I can’t just let my passions go and sit back. Why is focusing our passions so hard to do?

I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do - this I keep on doing.

Unless you are from another planet or a Baptist, you read these powerful words to those in Rome and track 100%. For as long as you can remember you’ve struggled. You battle with the choice of doing the right thing when the wrong thing is just so much more appetizing. I can recall time after time the moments in my life where I showed the perfect side of my life. All was right with the world and Mr. Blue Bird was on my shoulder. The truth of it all is that those bad passions are so irresistable and they often come from no where punching us like a quick right hook. When its time to bow our heads we feel as if we can walk on water, and then behind close doors we sink, having no faith at all. Anger consumes us. Grudges get the better of us. Gossip becomes the itch we have to scratch. Or is it scratch we have to itch? Lust clings to us like a shadow. And all the while we seem to find pleasure in it all.

Maybe it’s because of that feeling. At the peak of our bad passions we see all of the world. That moment brings upon us a sensation that takes away all the bad feelings we are dealing with. We are no longer fat or unwanted. Our fears melt away like ice cream on a hot day. Control. We feel important. Power. No one is more important. Happiness. We smile and forget about past abuse or relationships that went wrong. Alive. And things seem perfect and those things that hurt are no longer an issue . So we keep on…

We eat another dessert. We keep looking at porn. We continue to talk about others negatively. We drink till it feels better. We smoke all our feelings away. We eat. Matsturbate. Take another hit. Cry. Throw up. Manipulate. Laugh…at ourselves. We make our lives look perfect. Controlling all things in our lives, even the people we love. And as much as we hate the bad passions in our lives it is that feeling we seem to not be able to forget. It’s that temporary joy sin gives us that we crave.

In the past 18 months I’ve been blessed to hear the real stories of hurting people. A gay man searching for hope. A woman who danced for money, afraid of the baby that was on its way. A girl who committed adultry. A guy who just couldn’t shake the strangle hold of porn. A drug addict who watched a family walk away. A girl who cried herself to sleep every night because of her figure. A man who beat his 1 year old son. A guy dealing with sexual addiction, struggling to find a job. And many more stories of hurt and pain. What I’ve told every single person is the same thing I tell myself. Don’t wait to be healed. Don’t wait to get your life together. Don’t wait to find God in the midst of the storm. Because if you do, you miss something special. You miss the chance to see a God that very few get to see.

Simply put…Life’s a bitch. The sooner you realize that you can’t be healed is when you begin to heal. As long as there is good and evil there will be struggle. Such is life. The focus can never be to clean up and get perfect in order to find God. It’s when we choose to look for Him in the midst of the chaos. It’s then that we experience God pursue us not because of what we offer but because we are His.

So we share our stories. The truth. We sit down with a friend and hot coffee. And we share. We reveal those things that have rooted so deep we forgot it was there. We struggle. And we admit we are scared. Maybe for the first time we feel. And it’s in these moments of real life that we take a deep breathe and let out what seems to be hurt that’s ruled our lives. Ah yes! Good passion. A passion that seeks a joy that is not for a moment but that is lasting. And we enjoy the journey of not getting it right or even knowing what we are looking for. I pray you will experience that which I have enjoyed recently. And I hope you share it with those closest to you. To begin living life for maybe the very first time.

SB

Currently these are the top 7 songs I’m enjoying.

“Is It Any Wonder?” by Keane. album - Under The Iron Sea. This is Keane’s latest stuff and I can’t get enough of all these Brit bands becoming popular. Vocals, keyboard, and drums. Simple and superb.

“Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol. album - Eyes Open. I’ve become a big fan of these guys. Its the kind of rock music that just hooks you. This is the stuff you turn the dial all the way to the right for.

“World Spins Madly On” by The Weepies. album - Say I Am You. So maybe you’re not into Folk but there is something special about this music. Hearing the Weepies live was amazing. Its like nothing you’ve ever heard before and it’s perfect for relaxing and letting the stress drift away.

“A Quiet Mind” by Blue October. album - History For Sale. Warning about this band. I’m not a huge fan of all their stuff. But I love this song and a couple others. This song will not disappoint.

“Nothing Left To Lose” by Mat Kearney. album - Nothing Left To Lose. This guy writes solid songs and knows how to blend some hip hop type lyrics. The music video of this song is good.

“Shy That Way” by Tristan Prettyman. album - Twentythree. So I’m not crazy about the entire album but this song is pretty sweet. Jason Mraz joins her in the middle of this song and it’s just right.

“Look After You” by The Fray. album - How to Save a Life. This song never gets radio time and yet it was probably the best song they played at their concert. These guys simply know how to rock.

For now I hope you enjoy my current top 7. And remember to always purchase your music and spay your cats.

SB

I wonder what it was like to live life when there was no money. Everyone just traded chickens for pigs and corn for wheat. And life was easy. Right now there is about 30 pounds of wild organic blueberries in my freezer, and if I could I would use those tiny balls of goodness to trade for all kinds of stuff. My next meal at Pei Wei or paying off the next out of control electric bill. July was a hot month…cost me 12 cups of blueberries.

Today I came across a story that truly defines the world we live in today. A guy posts on his blog that he is wanting to trade his red paper clip. He gets a response of 2 girls who want to trade a fish pen for the red paper clip. He goes on to trade the fish pen for a door knob. Which he then trades for a Coleman Camping Grill. The Grill is traded for a Generator which is then traded for a keg party. The determination in this guy is greatness. He is able to then trade the party for a used snow mobile. The snow mobile is traded for a free vacation which is then traded for a moving van which is then traded to get a recording contract. Unreal. The contract is then traded to get a year of free rent. The free rent is traded for an afternoon with Alice Cooper. That afternoon date is traded for a KISS snow globe. Seems like a dumb move but he’s able to trade the snow globe to Corbin Bernsen for a role in a movie. And that role in a movie is traded to get a house in Saskatchewan, Canada. Now that’s a great story. Read the full story HERE.

Sooo…anyone interested in a Weber Charcoal Grill? How about a Canon Rebel Camera w/lens (FILM)? Um, I have a framed puzzle of a Noah’s Ark print. Any takers? Oh! How about tuba lessons. I played a mean tuba back in the day.

SB

Came across this clip of a baby girl not wanting to eat her green beans. I guess some are just not cut out for the organic life style. It’s just too funny to watch her get so dramatic about the torture she is being put through to eat her greens.

Check it out HERE.

SB

Not sure if this post is “Funny Ha Ha” or if its “Whatevaz Whateva” so for the first time OH&H is giving a post a double category. I honestly am not sure what to do with this story so pardon the confusion while I type.

On July 4 a mega-church, or I guess its a giga-church (toMAYtoe, toMAtoe) put up a 72 foot statue of Lady Liberty. It cost tithe payers…I mean rich Christians…um, what I’m trying to say is all the friendly giving folks at World Overcomers Outreach Ministries Church dropped a cool $260,000. It makes sense though if you think about it. This 12,000 member church in Memphis already has a bowling alley, bookstore, roller rink, school, and cafe. The next logical step in my eyes is “King Nebuchadnezzar made an image of gold, ninety feet high and nine feet…” wait, wrong story…the next step is Pastor Alton Williams leading his congregation to put this Jolly Green giant of a thing in front of their church. “This statue proves that Jesus Christ is Lord over America, he is Lord over Tennessee, he is Lord over Memphis,” says Willliams. I think it was at this moment the Angels in heaven cheered. With wings painted Red, White, and Blue the Angels above blared “God Bless the USA” By Lee Greenwood. I don’t know about you but heaven just got more appealing. (vomit sounds)

Some people in the community were outraged by this statue. But I say shame on you community. You should have seen it coming. It was not long ago this same church paid for full page ads in major Memphis newspapers condemning homosexuality. Nothing says love like “We hate gay people. ”

When asked why would you spend so much money on a statue when there are people in need, Pastor Williams replied , “We give millions to the poor.” Oh Pastor W, that’s what we sinners call justification. Besides, I think you had your Blackberry off when the poor around the world sent you an email. They’re tired of getting more money. They want you to know they give Lady “Love” 2 thumbs up and raise their dirty disease filled water glasses up high and toast to all the wonderful things she will bring to the community. Is it just me or is everyone just feeling so thankful God loves America more than any other country?

I’m sad to say this could be my last blog post ever. OH&H very well could be no more. Why you ask? Well, I also heard that in one of Pastor W’s books he states how Katrina was the result of sin and debauchery. If thats the case there is a very good chance an asteroid will be hitting my house tonight and I will die. If you never hear from me again please play “Friends Are Friends Forever” by Michael W. Smith at my funeral and please don’t forget to drape the American flag over my casket. Wait, I think I want to be cremated. Damnit, am I going to hell for that?

SB

We rationalize. We justify. We ignore. That’s how we deal with screw ups and anything we do that is not good. Anything that is not perfect. But until we face the ugly parts of our story we will never change. We will never grow. We will continue to stroll through life convincing ourselves that avoiding those uncomfortable things are what’s best for us. But in reality discovering the ugly is the only way to find beauty. The beauty that comes from truth.

What we do to others - it’s important to realize how we really impact people. As we stroll through life, we hurt and we help. It’s important to know how we do both. Have you ever asked your roommate or close friend what he or she doesn’t like about you? Tough question huh? But it’s in seeking that truth you uncover the ugly side. Your heart begins to really desire repentance and change for the way you hurt those you share life with. As you see the good you find joy and desire to continue those things that encourage.

What others have done to you - we know people hurt us. But we never really examine it. If we really processed how people have hurt us then we’d discover something so raw and real that it would change how we live. Because there is a simple fact of life - we hate pain. Eventually we come to a place (even if we don’t realize it) of avoiding the kitchen because the stove has burned us one too many times. The pain becomes so great we withold…we keep our true self hidden to avoid further hurt. This is where the cycle begins and being vulnerable scares the bejebbers out of us. Life is full of evil and pain. That will never change. But finding the courage to get back up is the difference between letting life happen to you and you living a passionate life.

Your attitude about God - if we are all honest with ourselves we don’t really trust God. I have at points been so mad at God that I was unsure of what I really believe in. That’s where things get exciting with my faith. It’s when I wasn’t afraid to feel. It’s when I wrestle inside with who God is and why it seems like He wants to screw with my life. In dealing with these real thoughts I try to desire Truth. I don’t want to be spoon feed American Christian propaganda but instead desire Truth. The kind that flips your world upside down. And thats when you encounter God in a special way. Because so far He’s showed me that He’s not afraid to get into the ring with me and deal with my doubts.

Below are some wise words and I hope that reading this will make you feel uncomfortable to the point of throwing up. To the point where you’ll desire change over being the same old self that avoids the ugly story within. I also hope that we never dwell in our ugly stories. Because the ugly is not what tells us who we are. Its the beauty that we find in the ugly that defines us. *By His stripes we are healed.*

“We must learn to tell the story of our lives - how we impact others, how we’ve been damaged by others, how we feel about God - in order to disrupt the sinful attitudes and paractices that still remain. Telling our stories requires us to face painful truths about ourselves. And once we’ve faced those truths, we will again feel the noble passions to love, to be, and to worship, passions planted in our hearts by God’s Spirit.” -L. Crabb

SB